The first phase of our project “Psychosocial Support and Health for the Elderly and Physically Disabled”, which we carried out in Hatay in partnership with Japan-based CCP, has been completed. In the second phase of the project, we are continuing our support and health literacy program.
In addtion to this, we conduct group work with those who want to help and support their elderly and disabled neighbors in temporary accommodation centers. For this purpose, we produced our brochure “Being a Good Neighbor to the Elderly and Disabled in Container Cities” and we are distrubuting it to the participants of the group work, to those who are interested and to camp administrators.
Our motto is “Being a good neighbor will be good for all of us.”
Good neighborliness is one of our most precious values.
After the earthquake, many of us lost our familiar neighbors; we became distant, but we met new neighbors in our temporary accommodation centers; we live with them. Let’s not forget that there are also elderly and disabled people who need our good neighborliness in our neighborhoods where we will spend some time, even temporarily.
Your attention and support to your elderly and disabled neighbors, especially those who have lost their families and relatives, who have fallen far away, is very valuable.
First steps
- The power of conversation: If you have not yet met your elderly or disabled neighbors, start by introducing yourself not as a philanthropist but as a resident of the same neighborhood. Start with a short conversation sharing stories and you will find that it will also help with your feelings of loneliness.
- Distanced intimacy: Find the right balance between helpfulness and respecting the autonomy of your elderly or disabled neighbor. Perhaps a friendly greeting from a distance, a knock on the door of the container and a gentle question about their health will remind them that they can turn to you when they need more help.
- The value of the neighborhood: If the situation allows, try to organize joint activities. A cup of tea together in the evening, knitting together, celebrating an important anniversary, a short walk around the container city can foster a sense of belonging and remind everyone that the spirit of neighborliness can prevail even in difficulties.
- Making what is difficult easier: The disaster may have deprived your elderly and disabled neighbors of their usual support networks. Offering to help with small needs is a simple but profound gesture that acknowledges the challenges they face. But remember, true kindness means allowing them to maintain their dignity even as you lend a helping hand.
- Language hurts: Observe the behavior of your children, young people and their friends and peers towards older people, especially those with disabilities. Intervene, warn and prevent behaviors such as belittling, mocking, verbal-physical teasing and similar behaviors.
Being a good neighbor will be good for all of us.
What you can do:
Introduce yourself: If you have not already done so, introduce yourself and explain that you are their neighbor.
Communication preferences: Ask how they prefer to communicate, a quick hello at the door, a wave from a distance or a set time for a chat. Respect their boundaries.
Respect for privacy: Do not comment on their private life, do not make suggestions, but be open to them sharing their needs.
Attention to their independence: Offer help, but do not be coercive. Allow them to maintain their autonomy as much as possible.
Be patient: In the long period after a disaster, people are stressed and may react in different, unusual ways. Be patient and understanding.
Practical Help:
Understand their needs: Start by gently understanding the specific challenges and problems faced by your elderly or disabled neighbor. This will help you offer the most appropriate assistance.
Medical support: Try to understand whether your elderly or disabled neighbor receives regular health care and whether he/she has easy access to a family doctor, specialist if necessary, or health worker. If there is an access problem, alert the authorities, primarily the camp management.
Basic needs: Especially if mobility is an issue, offer to help with daily chores such as fetching water, shopping for groceries or taking out the garbage.
Information sharing: Inform them about important announcements, relief efforts or camp events.
Physical assistance: Simple tasks like helping to carry an item or open a heavy box can be invaluable. But always ask first and avoid actions that make them feel dependent.
Emotional Support and Neighborhood Life:
Friendly Conversations: Join the conversation, share your stories or listen to theirs. Loneliness can be a big problem after a disaster.
Community Building: If appropriate, help organize joint events. Social interaction is vital.
Cooperation: When trying to provide the support the elderly or disabled person needs, try to involve other neighbors and work together. If you succeed, your sense of community will be strengthened.
Mobility Assistance: If your elderly or disabled neighbor has mobility restrictions, offer to help them get around the container campsite, access shared facilities or navigate rough terrain.
Assistive Devices: Be aware of any assistive devices they use (canes, walkers, wheelchairs) and offer to help them maneuver in tight spaces, negotiate difficult entry and exit points.
Safety and Security:
Be Aware of their situation: Be aware of any safety concerns about their living space. Try to see the environment through the eyes of your elderly or disabled neighbor and identify obstacles.
Emergency Plan: Be prepared for what to do in the event of an emergency for your elderly or disabled neighbor, or in the event of an accident in their container. Identify who to call for emergency contact, and share contact information in a visible way.
Evacuation Planning: Plan how you can help in case of an evacuation that requires leaving the container or camp. Find out where the first assembly area is. If support is needed in such a situation, think about who you can ask for help and discuss in advance.
Container Security: Help them take precautions in case of bad weather, or alert the camp management. During extreme heat waves, especially check on the situation of elderly neighbors.
To communicate better with the elderly:
- Pay attention to the emotional state of your elderly neighbors , not their words.
- Speak to your elderly neighbors in a loud voice but without shouting, be patient and calm. Try to stand on the same level with them and make eye contact.
- Do not get into arguments and do not try to correct them when they say something wrong. Instead, listen to their complaint or problem, tell them you agree with them, try to comfort them by drawing their attention to another subject.
- Be positive and reassuring. But avoid expressions that suggest helplessness, such as “let’s be thankful that we are alive” or “what should those who have it harder than you do”.
- People with dementia are afraid of the following: Noise, change of living space, change of caregiver. Be prepared for the psychological stress of these circumstances.
- If your elderly neighbor wears hearing aids or glasses, they may need more time to communicate. Be patient and clear in your communication.
Talking to people with disabilities:
- Do not approach disabled people who lost limbs in the earthquake and whose active treatments are over with language such as ‘You are cured now’, ‘It’s over, it’s gone, it’s over’. Remember that they have just come out of a difficult process and are trying to get used to a new life.
- “You are very active for someone who uses a wheelchair”, “You are very handsome/beautiful for a disabled person”. If you are saying these things to praise a disabled person and make them happy, don’t do it. What is wrong with just saying “You look good” without using the word disabled?
- “Can I ask you a personal question?” For a person with a disability, this is a signal that they will be asked something unpleasant about their condition, something they have probably heard many times. Do not ask any disabled person personal questions unless you are really close to them. If you are curious, ask someone who knows, find out.
- “Is your husband/brother like this?” “how many people are in your situation?” Do not try to start a conversation with questions that make us feel that people with disabilities are a different community, that we need to know everyone in the same situation.
If support is needed:
It is very appropriate and necessary to ask for support for the problems and needs of your elderly or disabled neighbors that you alone cannot solve.
Especially for the elderly, the feeling of “not being a burden” is very strong and this may prevent them from asking for even the most basic needs. Even if they do not speak up, report the problems and needs you observe to the authorities.
First of all, talk to the camp administrators. If you need more, contact the relevant service units and convey the problem or request directly to them.